8 Weeks

Punkid and I are doing just fine.  S/he is now the size of a kidney bean or raspberry (take your pick) and my uterus is quickly reaching abdominal cavity capacity.  Apparently it is now the size of a softball which explains why all of my skinny jeans are getting uncomfortable.  By Week 12, sometimes earlier, the intestines will be all squished together and my womb will start poking out beyond my ribs.  Right now,  I look and feel like I enjoyed a nice vacation noshing on bread, cheese, and wine in France (bloated, constipated, blah feeling) but maybe once there's an actual protrusion I will be able to relax and not have to keep saying in my head "I'm not pudgy, I'm pregnant." Seriously?  Where is my bump.  I would like something to show for this, please!

Soon enough, spring will bring the relief of leggins and tunics and I literally cannot wait to stop wearing pants for the next 7 months.   Did you know that Target sells Levis that are not maternity, not plus size, but elastic waist?  Amazing!  They aren't geriatric, either.  There's actual style to them.  They're in the Juniors department and they are thick enough denim that they can't be confused with jeggings, even though technically I think they are with no pockets or zippers or buttons.  I bought two pairs.  They look good now and will stretch over the next month so I can continue to wear my blazers and boots without attracting attention at school.  Only my CT knows and she's been very accommodating whenever I need to run to the bathroom in between classes.

There are tiny webbed fingers and toes forming this week, along with eyelids and lungs.  This will be the last of the Beluga stage, as I call it, with the tail disappearing over the next week.  I read somewhere that every embryo on earth begins with a tail stage so please tell me how there people who still refuse to believe in evolution?  I don't get it. 

I did allow myself to briefly browse some nursery gear in the million-and-one catalogs they send you once they find out you're expecting - the "they" being I don't know who, advertising clairvoyants, I guess - who latch onto my web history and the free app I downloaded to track my fetal development.  It's nuts!  In the space of one week I have gotten vouchers for 3D sonograms, Pottery Barn Kids, Babies R Us, Carters and others I've never even heard of.  Don't get me started on the facebook ads...what a strange world we live in.  There really is no privacy once you buy that first pregnancy test.